School Supplies are Evil

The other day, I had to make a Target run to pick up a prescription and a few odds and ends.  The Son of Never Stops Eating, whose love for Target is subordinate only to his love for swimming and Legos, immediately put on his Crocs and jumped in the car.

I'm going to go look at school supplies, I told him when we arrived. I'm not going to buy anything.  I just want to see what they have.  He looked at me in that sullen way that only a teenager can: all six feet of him hunched down in resignation, his brown eyes staring sulkily at me, and his mouth forming a pout.

Mom, he said, with a deep sigh, no kids want school supplies. School supplies are boring.  I'm going to go look at the Legos. I know, I know, you're not buying anything, you don't have to say it. He speed-walked away from me towards his beloved plastic bricks, making his escape before I could haul him off to the wicked world of the Back-to-School aisle.

I walked through the displays of folders and pencil cases, reminiscing about the days when the kids were young and school supplies were exciting.  When the Teenager went off to kindergarten, school supplies were an adventure filled with anticipation.  New crayons, markers, and paper were raw materials for the fantastic art she was going to bring home. A lunchbox with a favored cartoon character on it was her heart's desire come true.  Seventy page spiral bound notebooks for ten cents- who doesn't need to stock up on those?

You should just buy the PTA wrap pack, a friend of mine said.  It's so much easier.

Ahhh, but the experience of holding that fresh box of crayons, untouched by young hands, so full of possibilities.  No wrap pack could possibly match that feeling.  At least not for the year my oldest started kindergarten, when August was a new developmental milestone met: The School Years Begin!  Once the Teenager started first grade, I began to recognize the value of the PTA wrap pack.  The crayons were easy to find; the odd sized manila paper, not so much.  Just take my money, please.

Then adolescent hormones hit our household like a wrecking ball colliding with a building scheduled for demolition.  Instead of crayons and markers and cute little pencil boxes, it was mechanical pencils and college ruled spiral bound notebooks with 5 sections. It was conversations like this:

Me: So, what do you need for school?
Kid: I dunno.
Me: Haircut? New clothes? School supplies?
Kid: Whatever.
Me: Do your school shoes even still fit?
Kid: (eyeroll) How would I know? I don't even know where they are.

I finished my errands and went to retrieve the Son of Never Stops Eating.  He cast one last longing glimpse at his newest heart's desire and followed me to the checkout line. 

Did you find everything you needed? the cashier asked. Do you have your school supplies yet? Are you ready to go back?

My son stared at her, and shook his head.  Kids do NOT want school supplies, he said emphatically. School supplies are evil!

So, parents of kindergartners just starting out, enjoy the time when school supplies are exciting, because the shine wears off.  As for me, I know that in two years, I'll likely be doing the biggest school supply shopping trip of all time when the Teenager heads off to college.  For now, I'll be checking a certain backpack to make sure it contains notebooks and pens, and not loose Lego pieces.