I'm a Christmas slacker. I'm just going to say that right up front. The older I get, the lower the bar becomes in terms of what I consider to be a successful holiday. Christmas stresses me out in a way that Easter or the 4th of July doesn't. Even the greeting you choose can cause all-out political and social warfare if you choose poorly. No one gets mad if people working in a store don't say "Happy Easter" in the weeks preceding the holiday. Honestly, I'm happy as long as people are nice. I don't care if they say "Merry Christmas" or "Happy winter solstice".
Here is my list of what I have done in preparation for the Big Day:
1. I bought gifts.
Even this wasn't that easy. I can't actually tell you the story because it would give hints to a certain member of my family, but let's just say that complicating factors arose in the purchasing of one gift and I had to make multiple trips to a store and the store assistant manager got involved and even though at the end we were all "Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays!" it was rough going there for awhile. However, I was able to pick up some other presents at the most recent Friends of the Library book sale for the low price of free in exchange for two hours of volunteer labor. In the end, I think everyone will be happy.
2. I baked two batches of molasses cookies.
3. I wrapped presents while the kids and the Dad of No put up the Christmas tree. I decorated the mantel with a manger scene that my grandmother made many years ago.
4. I will be watching the best Christmas movie ever, "Christmas Vacation", at least once before Christmas day.
5. A co-worker gave me a little box of Christmas treats and I ate them. The fudge was delicious, although eating it at 7:00 in the morning might not have been the best idea.
6. Our family attended the Teenager's band Holiday Concert. Angst occurred when a Lego piece was dropped and rolled under a seat in front of us, but the piece was recovered after the concert and all was well.
When my kids were younger I did more. For example, there was the required trip to see Santa Claus. I made the mistake once of taking the Teenager to see Santa when she was a toddler and I was massively pregnant with the Son of Never Stops Eating, who was then the Son of Never Stops Kicking His Mother's Bladder. We waited in line for almost an hour and when we were next my daughter flat out refused to have anything to do with the guy in the red suit and his cheerful elves.
After that, this became the Santa Claus visiting procedure: If we run into Santa, we'll get a photo. Amazingly, every year for as long as the kids actually wanted to visit Santa, it worked out. Now that they're teenagers, the pressure is off.
2016 has been a difficult year for several reasons, and I will like nothing better than to see it end. I have no idea what 2017 will be like, but every January 1st feels like a fresh start even though the only thing that is really starting over is the health insurance deductible. When I see picture of extravagant cakes decorated to look like Santa or lavishly decorated houses, I'll admit that I feel a little pressure to be more jolly and accomplished than I am really feeling at the moment.
This year, however, since Christmas is the season for giving, I'm giving myself permission to not feel guilty about not having a creatively themed tree (the theme of our tree: "Ornaments we inherited from the Grandparents of No when they downsized their house"). Our Christmas cookies will probably come from Winco (in this house, it doesn't matter where the cookies come from; they will be devoured anyway), and the Son of Never Stops Eating will probably be wearing sweatpants to church on Christmas Eve (we did look for khakis but no luck finding any).
However, regardless of how you celebrate the season, I wish you the best one- may your days be joyful, may your kids not drive you nuts after six hours of being out of school, may you not have to return a single gift to the store, and may you survive all gatherings with relatives. From the Household of No, Merry Christmas.
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