Nothing is Ever Easy

Warning: This is a whiny post. I'll toss in a photo of a cute bird or something so you don't feel entirely brought down low, but I'm blogging while cranky so just know, you were warned.

I think it must be late-stage perimenopause, or plots by The Man to make life miserable, or just general frustration at modern life, but really, why does everything have to be so complicated?  Well, one thing in the last 2 weeks has been easy; I went to the dermatologist and got a clean bill of skin health, and I didn't even have to get weighed or lectured on eating too much salt or not getting enough exercise or that dental hygienist look that says "I know you're not flossing".  So I'm grateful for that.

In my e-mail today I received notice that two of the hotel rewards programs I got talked into joining are combining into one, so I needed to login to one account and press a button, and lo and behold, my points would transfer over and then I would be even closer to a free room or free magazines or whatever the rewards were. I'm honestly terrible at keeping up with all these rewards programs, but I didn't want to lose my points, because they were free and I don't want to give up so easily on something that was free, so I logged in and then was asked for the membership number for the other rewards program, which I didn't have, so I had to go find that and then it still didn't work, and after about six minutes of trying to figure out what the hell was going on now, I realized that I was leaving off one digit of the membership number, which was about twenty digits long.  Then the website crashed and I was instructed to try again later.

Medical insurance claims are another thing that always seems to get complicated.  A few months ago I had a thankfully brief emergency room visit after I woke up one morning and it felt like I was about to give birth to a full-grown T-Rex with giant claws and a really bad attitude.  Since there are all kinds of moving parts in the abdomen, who knew what was going on in there?  Appendicitis? Really bad stomach virus? Food poisoning? About the only thing that could be reliably ruled out was a gallbladder attack, since I no longer have a gallbladder. So off to the ER we go, and at some point the ER staff put some anti-nausea meds in the IV or maybe they injected it, I couldn't tell you, but about four months later I have now learned that apparently -at least in this specific instance- I could have all the Zofran my doctor wanted to prescribe in pill form, but when it's injected, it's considered experimental unless you're undergoing chemotherapy and if it's considered experimental then the insurance company balks at paying for it and it takes forever to get the claim processed and meanwhile the hospital is nagging you about paying a bill for a two hour ER visit that about equals a year's tuition, room and board at an in-state university.

Kids, there is a lesson here, and that lesson is this: Much of adult life makes absolutely no logical sense whatsoever.  Also, you should be aware that when seeking health care while in serious pain, you're evidently expected to ask questions like, "Is this substance that you are injecting into my IV covered by my health insurance policy?".

The tire pressure gauge in my car is another source of low-key frustration.  My old car didn't have a tire pressure gauge so you had no idea if there were problems with the tires until one actually went flat.  I rarely thought about the tires unless I started feeling that thunkety-thunkety, then I knew, hey,  I have a problem!  Then I bought a new car that came with the tire pressure warning light, and it goes off seemingly whenever it wants to- usually when it's pouring rain and I'm stuck in traffic.  Then I have to decide, is it just the car being cranky?  Because sometimes that light goes off and then it turns out that one tire just had slightly lower air pressure than the other three tires. However, sometimes that light goes off because there's a nail in the tire and a flat is getting ready to happen. Unfortunately, there's no way to know because the gauge doesn't give you that level of information.  Also, driving with the orange tire pressure light on drives me nuts, because I'm the kind of person who needs all those lights to be off otherwise I'm driving down the freeway envisioning imminent disaster.

I also have life-planning for The Son of Never Stops Eating frustration.  He wants to get a part-time job, which I think is great.  But since we will probably be applying for him to receive disability benefits when he reaches 18, he can't make too much money.  So the question is, how much is too much? When the College Student got her first job, I didn't think about that at all other than "Just make sure to keep the grades up".  The stakes are higher here.  If he makes too much money then he can be disqualified, apparently forever, from certain benefits.  So he can make so much per month, but I have to keep track of his pay periods, because if he gets paid every other week then there are two months of the year that are three paycheck months, and one of those paychecks could drive him over that threshold, and then well, we're pretty much doomed because I messed up and he made $5 more than he's allowed.   So when he does get a job, I'll have to have a conversation with his boss, who will probably be thinking I'm some helicopter mother with all these rules about how much the kid can make and how many hours he can work.  It's not me making this complicated, honestly.  It's The Man. If it were up to me, it would not be this complicated.  A lot of these rules seem to derive from the idea that we don't want people working the system to get more than they should get, but now there are so many rules it's nearly impossible not to screw something up even if your intentions are completely benign and honest.

I bet now you're thinking, hey, enough of these sad stories.  If you were the Grandma of No, you'd point out that at least I'm lucky enough to have a car and health insurance, which is definitely true, and now that I've thought that I feel like a completely ungrateful person and I just need to suck it up, buttercup. Which I will, until the next time I do something that gets complicated when it doesn't need to be, like buying a pair of jeans or figuring out the best way to get TV at the house. So here's the cute bird I promised.

Hermit Thrush

The Marsh Project Week #39

The marsh trail is back!  It was flooded, then closed for repairs, and after a long, agonizing wait, it's open once again!

I was so excited about this that I ventured out on a freezing, drizzling day just to see what was going on. I had low expectations but I didn't care; I needed to be on this trail.  I layered up, crossed my fingers (which are still frozen even though I've been home for over an hour), and got in the car.  As I drove towards my beloved trail, raindrops dotted the windshield.  This was not what I wanted to see; I momentarily considered turning back and spending the afternoon binge-watching The Handmaid's Tale in the warmth of my living room.  After deliberation, however, I decided that the trail was calling and I needed to answer even if I ended up a little damp.

As I made my way to the tall blind, it was obvious that the little birds were completely fine with the cold, dreary weather.  The sparrows and ruby-crowned kinglets were out flying from branch to branch, and the downy woodpeckers were actively pecking away at promising trees.  I tried for some great photos of a tiny ruby-crowned kinglet, but the bird decided that today was not my day and flew off.  The regal great blue herons at the river's edge were willing to stand still, though.  Great blue herons are the Buckingham Palace Queen's Guard of nature- no matter how cold or how annoying the lady with the camera is, they don't even move an eye.

In the distance, I could hear a belted kingfisher chattering.  It was much too cold for snakes and too early in the year for dragonflies or butterflies, so it was me and the birds.  Like the ruby crowned kinglets, the ducks in the ponds flew off as they heard me coming.  I stood at the tall blind for awhile, looking at the remains of last summer's vegetation and thinking that I had seen a few trees beginning to bud out; spring (and the dragonflies) is not that far away.

As I made my way down the trail, I looked down to see two Harris' sparrows hopping around on the ground in front of me, pecking around in the ground cover.  If they knew I was there, they didn't seem to care; they were busy about their own work.  They were constantly moving and that made it harder to get a good photo, but good enough for ID is good enough for me.

On a whim, I decided to walk back to one of the other ponds.  As I walked past it, something on one of the trees caught my eye- was that part of a tree, or was it a critter?  A view through binoculars and the camera confirmed that it was a hairy beast of some kind, but what kind?  I could not easily determine.  I sat for a few minutes watching the mysterious hairy tree blob to see if it would move but of course it did not; finally it was time to go.  Later, looking at the hairy blob on the computer, it was easier to see that it was a raccoon.

After that, it was time to go- my hands were freezing, the battery on the camera was blinking a warning, and the park was about to close.  However, it had been a successful reunion, and I was glad I had ignored the raindrops on the windshield of the car.

Pelicans! Pelicans! Pelicans!

It's been awhile since I posted a Marsh Project post.  I have several reasons for that: I got busy with the holidays, I needed to take a brief writing break because my brain needed a rest, and the marsh trail has been partially inaccessible due to flooding and rain.  I'm putting that project on hiatus until the trail dries out a bit because right now all the posts would be the same: Look! Water! Mud! More mud! Look at all the mud! OMG, there is so much mud out here! So I'm going to focus on something different: American White Pelicans. 

Sometimes when the good Lord taketh away, the good Lord also giveth- and in this instance, the good Lord gave American White Pelicans below the dam at the nature preserve.  These pelicans show up when the dam is releasing massive amounts of water, and they usually stick around until the release goes back to normal.   How the pelicans know the dam is releasing water, I do not know- but they do.  Human fishermen also show up to take advantage of the fishing, which sometimes leads to unfortunate humankind-pelican interactions, like pelicans getting entangled in fishing line.  Other birds- osprey, herons, egrets, cormorants, kingfishers, and bald eagles- also come looking for fish. 

I could watch these pelicans for hours.  OK, confession time: Sometimes I DO watch these pelicans for hours.  I'll sit down with my camera on a rock, thinking that I'm only going to stay for a few minutes, and then the next thing I know the park is closing and the ranger is telling people it's time to go, or my stomach will start growling and I'll realize that I've been watching pelicans for almost two hours and it's time for lunch.  One of my New Year's goals was to spend much less time on Facebook, so I figure that if I'm watching pelicans, I'm not on Facebook arguing about politics.  Win-Win. 

The pelicans are very entertaining to observe. They're huge birds, but wonderfully graceful in the air. They'll fly up from downstream towards the dam, looking like small pelican-shaped aircraft, until they get close to where they want to be, then they put their feet down to prepare for landing.  They will float on the water, just kind of hanging out like a bunch of teenagers at the mall, until several of them will decide that it's fishing time.  They'll rise up out of the water, wings flapping wildly, and all meet together in one spot.  If you observe closely, often you'll see one pelican come out of that with a fish in its beak.  It happens really quickly; I've concentrated my efforts on getting better at reading pelican body language so I can tell when this is getting ready to happen so I can be prepared with the camera, but that is definitely a work in progress. 

I recently discovered that my camera has a sports function on it, and if you are using the sports function and you hold the photo-taking button (I'm sure it has a technically correct name; I just don't recall it right now) down, the camera will keep taking photos until you release the button. So, instead of taking thirty photos and getting three or four good ones, I can take two hundred photos and get three or four good ones.  I mostly use the auto function of the camera because I'd rather be looking for wildlife to photograph rather than learning how to use the camera, but I might have to pull up the manual and read it; maybe there are other functions that would be useful. 

I'm including some of the photos I've taken in the last few weeks so that if you have not been fortunate enough to see these birds IRL, you can get a glimpse of how great they are to watch and how beautiful they are.  I'll be glad to have my marsh trail back for hiking, but I'll also be sad to see the pelicans go.  

If you're intrigued, like I am, by these pelicans and want to learn more: 

All About Birds: American White Pelicans

I'm So Bored, Mom

Over the Christmas and New Year's holidays, I did something unforgivable to the Son of Never Stops Eating, and he will never let me forget it.

For awhile now, I've been telling him that we should probably get him a state-issued ID card.  He has a debit card and a school ID, and the next step in Transition to Adulting would be obtaining a state ID card.  Really, the only obstacle was that I didn't want to take a day off work to wait in line; I knew the Son of Never Stops Eating would be thrilled to take a morning off of school no matter what the reason, but I want to use my own work leave for exciting stuff like birding, or deep cleaning the garage.  

January 2nd was a cold and miserable day; as I was out running errands, the thought popped into my head: Hey! I bet EVERYONE is sleeping off their New Year's partying hangovers and watching football bowl games and going to the gym to work out as part of their New Year's resolutions, and the people who aren't at the gym or at Whole Foods stocking up on healthy food or at work are probably looking outside at the rain thinking, ewwww…..who wants to go out there?  I bet there is NO ONE at the Department of Public Safety office! I raced home, picked up the Son of Never Stops Eating and the documentation we needed to prove citizenship, residency, and identity, and raced back to the DPS, convinced that the office would be empty except for the people working there and that those people were probably bored out of their minds at the lack of customers and would be thrilled to see someone.

This is going to be great, I told the Son of Never Stops Eating.  We can get this knocked out and I won't have to miss work and you won't have to miss school.

I'm OK with missing school, Mom, he said sulkily.  Nothing ever happens at school except boring stuff like learning.  You're the only one who doesn't want me to miss school.

We walked into the building and up the stairs....where it immediately became clear that lots of people had apparently had exactly the same idea I'd had- the day after New Year's Day was going to be an excellent time to go to the DPS.  

Oh, I said to the Son of Never Stops Eating.  It looks like everyone had the same idea I did. He rolled his eyes and gave a deep, angst-filled sigh.   But now we're here, so we might as well wait.  Thirty minutes later, we were still waiting, but we'd moved slightly closer to the front of the line- which was, a helpful DPS lady came out and informed us, about a three hours long line.  By then I was committed.  I'd already invested thirty minutes of my time into this project plus the gas and wear and tear on my vehicle;  if I left now, those thirty minutes were completely wasted.

I bet if the Orange Man weren't President there wouldn't be lines like this, the Son of Never Stops Eating muttered.

An hour later, the end of the outside line was in sight.  We'd still have to wait some more once we got into the DPS itself, but we'd get to sit down.  My lower back was aching and my right knee was starting to hurt.  The helpful DPS lady came back and repeated her spiel- three hour wait, lots of kids out of school, you could make an appointment or renew online.  The Son of Never Stops Eating sighed and said Mom, this is SO boring.

Another hour later, and we got a number and two chairs.  I sat looking expectantly at the electronic board flashing the numbers of who was next; the Son of Never Stops Eating sat next to me, explaining to me on a regular basis just how boring this was.  I know it's boring, I told him.  This is what adulting is.  Adulting is waiting in lines being bored so you can fill out paperwork and hand over money to people. It was worse before smartphones. At least now we can all catch up on our social media while waiting in boring lines.  Mom, he responded, this is the most BORING thing ever.  NOTHING is more boring than this. This is even more boring than school.  This is my vacation and you're making me wait in this BORING line when I could be doing fun stuff like Legos and watching Simpsons.

Finally, another hour later, and our number flashed up on the board.  Hey, I told him, that's us! It's our turn! He sighed dramatically and said, so we're done with the boring stuff?  We can go home now?

The actual process of getting the ID card only took a few minutes.  It doesn't seem to expire for several years, for which I am personally quite grateful.  However, the next day I mentioned to someone within the Son of Never Stops Eating's hearing that we'd gone and gotten his ID card.  Yes, he said, my mom made me do it and it was SO BORING!  Then a few days later we drove by the building and he made sure to point out that it was the Building of the Boring Place.

He will never forgive me for taking him there and making him wait forever to get a little plastic card, but I didn't have to take a day off work- so the experience wasn't a total loss.

The Marsh Project Week #38

It is the day before Thanksgiving and I am on an afternoon hike; I have picked up the pre-cooked turkey dinner, the ingredients for the traditional green bean casserole with the fried onions that I have to have for Thanksgiving dinner (but don't make at any other time of the year), and my freezer is stocked with delicious frozen chocolate pies from the grocery store.  I am all about the low maintenance Thanksgiving dinner.

The water release from the dam has diminished, and the marsh trail is open again although it is muddy and it is obvious from the recently drowned vegetation how high the water had been in certain places.  Not much is going on; it's likely a bit too cold for snakes, although a pair of turtles are sitting on a log out in the pond; as I walk by on the boardwalk, which is littered with leaves, they slide back into the water.  A few variegated meadowhawk dragonflies land on the boardwalk and then fly away again; a bright orange question mark butterfly lands on some of the browning vegetation and opens its wings, sunning in the waning late afternoon light.

I walk down the boardwalk to the small blind, and am struck by the lighting amongst the cattails.  I pause for a minute.  I am thankful, grateful, full of awe, to be in this moment in this place as the early winter light strikes the cattails and shines through it. I take a photo, knowing that the results will be only a weak depiction of what I am seeing, but needing to document it anyway.  This is the day before Thanksgiving, after all, and it is a time to consider what we are thankful for.  I am thankful for many things but in this moment I am filled with gratitude for my mud-caked boots, for the winter sparrows chirping in the distance, for the osprey flying overhead carrying his own early Thanksgiving dinner of a fish, for the cold but fresh air, for the sunlight filtering through the cattails, for this moment of peace in a chaotic world.

Later, when I look at my pictures, I will see the light illuminating the individual strands of the cattail spike, along with tiny seeds that were not visible to my eyes on the trail.

As I continue on, I see some American coots on the water;  as I get closer, one flies away and then the others, equally startled by my presence, take off.  In the distance, I can see what could be gadwalls, but I can't be sure.  I leave the marsh behind and head into the wooded upland portion of the trail; here the sparrows are plentiful, and a pair of bright red Northern cardinals fly from branch to branch, evading a clean line of sight.  Just as I move to continue my walk, a beautiful white-throated sparrow alights on a branch and I get my photo.  A few months ago, the indigo and painted buntings were in the same tree, but now they are gone.  Winter is nearly here.

I look down and see some feathers on the ground; I wonder what goes on around this trail when people are not here. I hear rustling near the trail, and look up; what has to be the largest armadillo I have ever seen is rooting around in dead leaves.  As the armadillo moves on, a brown thrasher appears under a nearby tree and then flies off as I proceed towards the trailhead and my car; the preserve will be closing soon and it is time to get home; green bean casserole preparation awaits.

The Marsh Project Week #37

The dam is still releasing water at a stunning rate, so the trail to the marsh is still flooded.  I was out of town this past week, but was able to get to the nature preserve over the weekend; on Saturday morning, it was not to hike but to participate with the Son of Never Stops Eating in a trash cleanup, and then Saturday afternoon and Sunday morning I was able to get some hiking in.

The Son of Never Stops Eating was appalled at the amount of trash- especially glass bottles, beer cans, and fishing line- that we managed to pick up.  He kept asking me why people just couldn't put their trash where it belonged instead of tossing it on the ground or in the bushes, because didn't they realize that Mother Nature doesn't want their trash?

 As we were working with other groups to clean the area up, I came across another American white pelican that had suffered a fatal encounter with some fishing line.  When I showed this picture to people, several people felt that the answer to the problem was to stop allowing fishing.  That would probably solve the problem, but I'm not completely comfortable with that- the birds have great value to me, but fishing is also a valid recreational activity.  For some people, it's dinner.  For others, it's quality outdoor family time;  I remember how excited my kids were to catch their first fish.   I took a philosophy of environmental ethics class years ago and it just about broke my brain; what is the value of a pelican and is it worth cutting off access to another recreational activity that also has value?  I hope that there is an answer that allows for both; I just don't know what that answer is, especially when I see the damage firsthand to a bird species I love.

It was cool and cloudy Saturday and then Sunday it was just cold.  That didn't seem to bother some of the winter birds that have arrived; it's time once again to start working on the identification of the "Little Brown Birds" that are suddenly everywhere.  I'm starting to learn a few of them- there were plenty of white-throated sparrows near the entrance to the flooded marsh trail, and they were hopping on and off branches and then going to ground while I stood mostly helpless with my camera hoping that one would decide to hang out in clear view on a branch for a few minutes.  I finally met with success after several minutes of patient, quiet waiting.

The brown thrashers were also plentiful and lively, and hard to find as they moved around on the ground- but after more patient, quiet waiting I was able to get a fairly decent shot (as in, good enough for ID) of one.  The main theme for winter bird photography seems to be patient, quiet waiting- and good eyesight; unlike the herons and egrets, which are usually easy to find (except for those tricky green herons, which hide along the shoreline or amongst the lily pads) and photograph from a distance, these winter birds require a lot of work.

The dragonflies and butterflies were not in evidence this past weekend- except for one or two hardy variegated meadowhawks and some common buckeyes.  I'll be looking forward to seeing them again next spring.

The Marsh Project Week #36

I'm getting a little behind in my marsh project documentation, and some of it is my fault, but forces beyond my control are also playing a role- we've had a huge amount of rain, and the marsh area has been flooded and inaccessible.  Fortunately, I was able to access the trail for a short afternoon walk yesterday, and it was a mess- leaves and branches everywhere, and lots of mud.  I was really glad I was wearing my waterproof boots.

This area is located right below a large dam, and sometimes water is released from the dam at a rapid rate, and it attracts pelicans, cormorants, egrets and herons to feed on the fish.  The pelicans wait just past where the rapids of the water coming out of the outlet gates subside; they are entertaining to watch as they fish, bob on the water, and defend their fishing grounds from other birds.  However, the area is also popular with the two-legged fishermen.  Usually we can all co-exist together, but unfortunately sometimes challenges emerge- sometimes birds get entangled in the plastic fishing line, and they cannot always free themselves.

On Friday, a nature-loving friend of mine posted on his Facebook page that he had seen an American white pelican get entangled in line below the outlet gates, and the pelican had to be rescued by the local fire department.   I've cleaned up enough fishing line in the last few years to fill up several large trash bags, and I've developed a loathing for the stuff.  I wish I knew the magic formula for getting people to pick up their fishing line (and other trash) but I don't, and it seems so unfair to the birds who unwittingly get tangled up in fishing line and have to fight (sometimes unsuccessfully) to get free.  We can't fix all the world's problems, but picking up trash and fishing line is always a step in the right direction.

I was expecting not to see much wildlife on my hike, except perhaps for some gulf fritillary butterflies, some winter sparrows and some late fall dragonflies- the last few Eastern pondhawks, a few common green darners, and the variegated meadowhawks. What I wasn't expecting to see was a red saddlebags, hanging on.  Of course, it had chosen a perch with lighting not conducive to great nature photography, but I did my best.

I had another surprise waiting for me as I got closer to the end of the trail- a cottonmouth snake, curled up on a fallen tree trunk.  The striking thing about this snake was that it had different coloration than what I'm used to seeing.  I got several photos (from a respectful distance, as always) before it slithered off the log to go about its snakey business.

This morning, the outlet gates were being opened further, so the trail will be inaccessible again, but fortunately there are other trails to explore; the winter birds (the kinglets, the sparrows, the wrens) are coming; I can hear them tweeting in the branches, so we'll be playing hide and seek all winter.